“All-out war, lad. You smell that?”
A well-armored gnome with a shock of silver hair emerged from the rags of smoke, flaming rubble and the gunmetal grey world beyond with a sprightly hop. He held in one hand a metal rod and the other a shield contoured with thorium alloy — both of which crackled and gleamed with pale blue energy.
“I love the smell of burning metal in the morning. I love the Corps!”
He sniffed the air. His handlebar mustache wiggled.
“Name’s Sergeant Berton C. Bellicose — but you can call me ‘sir.’ The enemy? They’re out there, always — and every last one of the tireless bastards without empathy. Without a soul. Forever scanning. Clanking. Whirring. Clicking. Hydraulic limbs pistoning all over the place.”
“Wages?” He threw his head back and laughed. “We’ve got indefatigable kill-machines hunting us down like shrieking rats every day of our lives and you think we still have some sort of balanced economy in place, brother? How long they say you were in the freezer for again?” He shook his head and muttered, “Mechs programmed solely to kill us and he’s worried about his allowance.”
He turned his head and spat.
“But we got you now, is that right? The ‘savior.’ You ask me, all I see is another stack-of-dime-necked pansy looks like he just clawed his way outta an irradiated chasm in Gnomeregan. This is how we overcome the merciless machine masses, huh?” He shook his head.
“Well, even if you don’t look worth a damn — we can still strap you up to kill some mechs. You think you’re ready to kill some mechs or not, sweetheart? Let’s go.”
Salvaged Goblin Workshop
Berton says:
Robot says:
Berton says:
Robot says:
Encounter #1: Junkbot
Deck:
Card | Quantity |
---|---|
Clockwork Gnome | 2 |
Anodized Robo Cub | 1 |
Coghammer | 2 |
Goblin Auto-Barber | 1 |
Screwjank Clunker | 2 |
Unpowered Steambot | 2 |
Berton says:
Dr. Boom says:
Dr. Boom grabs you by the shirt collar when Berton isn’t looking.
Berton says:
Dr. Boom says:
Mission Rewards:
“Found this guy with his legs twitching out the side of a tire-stack taller than the Zul’Farrak pyramid. Apparently he wasn’t swift enough for the Robot Empire ranks; you ask me, even with all the mileage on him — after I polished him up and tightened some screws and aheh, bolts — he’s still more functional than a litter of gnomes and a throng of dwarves put together. Plenty of hustle.”
“Be careful with that now. I modified the hell out of it, sure, but it won’t work on every mech. Still, damn if it ain’t one of the best feelings in the world turning one of those mindless automatons into your own personalized puppet. Aheh.”
Alarm-o-Bot says:
Berton says:
Junkbot says:
Berton says:
Dr. Boom says:
Robot Commander says:
Encounter #2: Overseer Detritus
Introduction:
“And the J.D. Power Award for most inferior organisms snubbed in a single performance goes to…”
Special Cards:
Card | Quantity |
---|---|
Bionic Buzzard | 2 |
Demolisher | 2 |
Coghammer | 2 |
Scrap Scrounger | 2 |
Soot Spewer | 2 |
Spider Tank | 2 |
Arcane Nullifier X-21 | 2 |
Flame Cannon | 2 |
Hydraulic Fracturing | 2 |
Junk Brute | 2 |
Upgraded Repair Bot | 2 |
Crank Golem | 2 |
Flame Leviathan | 2 |
Cobalt Guardian | 1 |
Mimiron’s Head | 2 |
D.R.E.C.K. | 1 |
Anima Golem | 2 |
Dr. Boom says:
To be continued…
Did you like this custom Hearthstone adventure Forward, the Mechs? Be sure to check out our Return to Un’Goro adventure.
Ninja Gaiden was my rite of passage at an early age. After finally beating that game (and narrowly dodging carpal tunnel) I decided to write about my gaming exploits. These days I enjoy roguelikes and anything Pokemon but I'll always dust off Super Mario RPG, Donkey Kong Country and StarFox 64 from time to time to bask in their glory.
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